[T]he long beards reminiscent of 19th-century lithographs, the scraggly-haired women with wire-rim glasses, the elbow-patched 1950s sports jackets - [were a sign] that days before the Mummers, another colorful species had hit town.Ha, ha, ha! We can't dress and we have long beards (for the record, beards are awesome) and don't even get me started on those women philosophers, I mean, buy a comb already! Zing!
Perhaps I'm duly unkind, when you get past the stereotypes (arguers! bad dressers!), the writer seems pretty sympathetic to the philosophic plight. He does mention the "scuttlebutt among APA's roughly 550 job-seekers...that more than 10 percent of 300-plus advertised positions may have been canceled." But, then he proceeds to quote the happiest job-seeking philosopher ever (Dr. Morris, sometimes I wish I had your passion and positive outlook; be angry!) and also feels the need to mention he has a ponytail. I want more on how hard it is out there for a philosopher, less comments on hairstyles. How else will the general public know how much to pity us? Sympathy isn't enough. We want pity, not sympathy...
You know, I never thought I'd see another dereliction of journalistic duty on par with the run-up to the Iraq War. I was wrong. Where's the call for an academic bailout to ease our pain? Where are our government subsidies for clothes? And, what the fuck is a scuttlebutt?